Just a quick note to let you know my doctor sent me the results of my annual labs. Good news and bad news.
Good news is that he says I've got the blood work of a 35 year-old. This is especially good news because he'd already predicted the 35 year-old part, but given my general distrust of vegetables and balanced diets thought it would be for a 35 year-old cat. I've known my doc for 20 years and what he lacks in skill and technique he makes up for with a Dr. House-like bedside manner.
Bad news is that if he's right, I'll outlive my savings by quite a bit. I need to eat more organ meat or start winning the lotto at something more than my usual $10 in, $3 out rate. On the bright side, he could be wrong -- I know he carries malpractice insurance so he doesn't expect to be right all the time.
On the down side, my cat's a little pissed off about the whole thing. Mac's getting ready for his annual check up as well -- been cutting back on the kibble, concentrating on smaller portions of canned fish and sprinting to the cat box for exercise. You see a 20 pound cat power shifting down the hall and you're doing a "note to self" about staying to the right.
Mac's FIV, which I thought meant he was an "e" short of a half-dozen, but turns out it's like HIV for cats; he's a little hesitant to talk about how he got it, but I'm given to understand it's passed around when cats fight. And since Mac was feral until we got him, it's a pretty good bet that eating food out of a can is something new for him. His barber asked if he bites and I told him he not only bites, he kills. Anyhow, we're going to have him re-tested to see if he can hang with some buds, or whether he's got to stay in solitary.
But he's not especially digging the 35-year-old cat crack, because it's not entirely clear to him if the doc was talking about cat years or human years. And I thought he was being a little oversensitive until he explained it: if I'm as healthy as a 35 year old cat, I've got just enough money to retire on; if it's a 35 year old man, then I gotta do something about the lotto.
I think I'll ask Mac's doc.